The weather has turned extremely humid again; thunder clouds loom over us, and we're waiting for a downpour that will make tonight's commute a living hell. I feel wet even though it's not raining (hey, maybe I'm just sweating profusely?).
And summer's back. Yesterday temperatures reached 30 C again and they will not drop below this threshold the next 10 days or so.
Mornings used to be crisp and cool, birds singing with new found energy, happy to announce a new day. Today our cheery friends whistled only muffled tones.
God, I miss dry and sunny California.
I'm going window shopping today. There are about thousands of books to browse, hundreds of CD's to listen to and it's going to keep me busy all day. I'm one of those people you can drop off in a Barnes & Noble, rambling like a tod in a bath of balls in Ikea.
I might even go watch that Indiana Jones movie. Finally.
PS. I got back from my previous employer that there are no job openings anymore. Plus I also found out that the Narafi full time day film school has reached its attendance limit, and because the 5 year program in the Art Academy evening school will not give you a bachelor's degree, I just feel totally fucked. On the other hand, thanks to my ability to stay positive I'm sure some other job prospect will turn up somehow, leaving me enough time and energy to pursue my passion in film. This, however, leaves me with unrest that I now have to accept and let go of until I'm back in B and can start doing something about it. I just wished everything would have turned out the way I planned it to. I was going to go back, start that job I know is a steady job, start film school and be all happy and ambitious the next 5 years. Now I'm left with the remnants of a plan that is hanging by a thread. I'm not giving up, though. Never.
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
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5 comments:
Hmm, maybe you should read your buddhist blog again and then read your ps. It is interesting.
"Abandon any hope of fruition."
yea I also found it kind of ironic that you wront this blog after you wrot the buddhist blog. maybe you wrote that buddhist blog becuase of the way you are feeling in this blog?
thanks for pointing this out guys. I guess what I'm trying to say in this PS is that I have accepted the situation but nevertheless feel bad about it for a moment, because I'm only human. :-)
But now, after writing this PS down in that very moment, I can accept and move on with the realization that things are always fine the way they turn out. So right now, I refuse to worry too much about when I will get back or what the future will bring because I will just figure it out when I get there. There ain't much I can do from here now anyways. :-)
PS: Now I feel like a complete nitwit commenting to my own blog. :-)
De werkloosheid in Belgiƫ is nog nooit zo laag geweest!werk genoeg! We need you! Er is ook nog altijd zelfstudie zodat je perfect voorbereid aan het volgende jaar kan beginnen.
Zo moet je denken! positief blijven! Genoeg leuke en goeie jobs die je hier kan doen!
Nie te veel denken aan de toekomst (ga da ook proberen)tzal wel allemaal duidelijker worden als je hier terug bent!
xxx
Wendy
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